The Dispatch
No XLVIII · Separation · 5 min
The first 30 days after she says it's over
A blunt field guide to the first month after the conversation. Sleep, paperwork, the kids, and the part nobody warns you about.
No · · CO-PARENTING
Co-parenting and special needs
Divorce is hard on every kid. It is harder, structurally and predictably, on a kid with autism, ADHD, a learning difference, or a chronic illness. The two-houses problem isn't a metaphor. It's a sensory, medical, and administrative load you didn't sign up for, and you signed up for it anyway.
28 Apr 2026 · 9 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The first night home from hospital
The drive is forty minutes at thirty kilometres an hour. The door closes. You realise nobody is coming to check on you, and the small person in the bassinet is now, in some legal and biological sense, your problem.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The second-month fog
Weeks six to ten are harder than the first six. The visitors stop. The adrenaline runs out. The sleep debt stops being a number you can count and starts being a thing your body does to you.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
When she has postnatal depression
It doesn't always look like sadness. Sometimes it looks like rage at the dishwasher, a flatness behind the eyes during a feed, or the sentence "I shouldn't be a mother" said quietly at 2am. Your job is to recognise it, name it, and act.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
When you have postnatal depression
About one in ten new fathers develops postnatal depression. It rarely looks like sadness. It looks like anger, withdrawal, working too much, drinking more, fantasies of leaving. The shame loop keeps it hidden. Here's what to look for and what to do.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The witching-hour survival
Five to seven in the evening with a baby is the worst stretch of the day, and not because you're doing anything wrong. It's developmental, not parental. Here's why it happens, what works, and why the 5pm handover is a marriage move.
28 Apr 2026 · 6 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
Introducing solids without losing your mind
Around six months you go from milk-only to a war zone of pumpkin and avocado. Here is what the Australian guidelines actually say, why iron matters more than Instagram, and how to read the gag reflex without panicking.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The six-month sleep regression
The well-named, badly-understood phenomenon. What is actually happening, why more solids does not fix it, and how couples actually decide which sleep approach to run.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The first real illness
RSV. Gastro. Croup. Eventually one of them lands. The dad register is not panicking and not dismissing. Here is the Australian triage path, the signs that matter, and the line for the ED.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The first twelve months of marriage after baby
The marriage is hardest in months four to fifteen, not months one to three. Here is why the data shows a sharp drop in relationship satisfaction, and the specific failure modes that cause it.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
Balancing work and newborn, realistically
Going back after parental leave creates a partner-asymmetry that nobody warned you about. The 7am chaos, the 5pm chaos, and what actually works in dual-career households with a baby.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
Baby number two, the different game
Two kids is not twice the work, it is a different problem. The first child regresses. The marriage cracks in new places. You cannot run a household solo when one parent goes down. What is easier, what is harder, and why nobody warned you about the no-honeymoon part.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
Being the default parent as a dad
The social architecture of Australian parenting is not built for dads doing the primary share. The school-mum networks close at the gate. The playground at 11am is a quiet place. Here is how to find your people, hold your identity, and not lose your mind in the process.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The dad friend network
Fatherhood reshuffles your friend list whether you asked it to or not. The mates from before kids drift. The new dad-friends form in odd places. Here is why "we will catch up when the kids are older" is a lie, and how to build a small network of dads you actually like.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · FATHERHOOD
The first birthday and what it marks
The first birthday is not really for the baby. It is the year you survived. The party is a marker, not a celebration. What you learnt, what the marriage learnt, what the photo of you exhausted at the cake is actually saying.
28 Apr 2026 · 6 min
No · · HEALTH
Testosterone after 40, the honest version
Testosterone declines after 40. That is normal. The rate is what matters, and the rate is mostly fixable with sleep, weight, and alcohol before any clinic touches you with a needle. The honest version of low T, what the lab numbers actually say, and why the men''s clinic on Instagram is selling you a problem you may not have.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · HEALTH
When the scan finds something
The phone call you do not want to get. "We''ve found something on your scan, we''d like you to come back in." Most incidental findings are nothing. Some are serious. The 24 to 48 hours between the call and the next appointment are the worst part, and they are also the part where men make the worst decisions. Here is how to navigate the panic window without burning your marriage, your sleep, or your sanity.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · HEALTH
The prostate test conversation
PSA testing is not on the standard Australian health check, and most men are surprised by that. The Cancer Council''s position is informed-consent, not blanket-screen, and the reasons are better than they sound. When to start asking, what an elevated PSA actually means (mostly not cancer), what the DRE is really for, and the biopsy flow if it gets there. The honest version, not the alarmist one.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · HEALTH
Men's cardio, the old rules are wrong
The "long slow run is good for your heart" assumption is half right and half wrong. Modern cardio research has converged on a model that almost no recreational runner is actually doing: 80 percent at very low intensity, 20 percent at very high intensity, with very little in the middle. The grey zone where most men train is the worst zone for adaptation. Here is what four hours a week should actually look like, in heart-rate numbers your watch can read.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · HEALTH
Mobility as the new strength
Hip, ankle, and thoracic mobility decline accelerate after 40, and most men do not notice until they cannot get off the floor without using their hands. Strength is not the rate-limiter for being able to lift, run, or play with kids at sixty. Mobility is. Ten minutes a day on four specific drills beats one hour a week of "mobility class" you forget by Tuesday. The drills, the rationale, and what the decline looks like if you ignore it.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · HEALTH
Alcohol and recovery after 40
Three drinks at 42 is not three drinks at 28. Here is what changed inside, and what to do about it.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · HEALTH
The stress fracture no one warns you about
The bone in my shin gave out at 43. The radiologist was not surprised. Here is what nobody told me about running back into your old self.
28 Apr 2026 · 7 min
No · · HEALTH
The lower-back truth after 40
The MRI shows degeneration. The pain shows movement. Most lower-back pain in men over 40 is not what you think it is.
28 Apr 2026 · 8 min
No · · HEALTH
The resting heart rate tell
One number, measured before you get out of bed, tells you more than most blood tests. Here is how to read it without obsessing over it.
28 Apr 2026 · 6 min