The Dispatch

XLVIII

No XLVIII · Mental Health · 7 min

Finding the right therapist (as a man who's never tried)

Cancelled my first session twice. Here's the practical map I wish I'd had before I sat in the car park rehearsing what to say.

26 Apr 2026

No XLVII · MENTAL HEALTH

The emotional stages of divorce, and how each one breaks you

Denial, grief, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. They cycle like weather. What each stage feels like, and what helps.

26 Apr 2026 · 8 min

No XLVI · MENTAL HEALTH

Loneliness after divorce, ten things that actually help

Bought a hose fitting I didn't need just to talk to the bloke at Bunnings. Ten things that moved the needle on post-divorce loneliness.

26 Apr 2026 · 8 min

No XLV · MENTAL HEALTH

Mental health support for divorced men, where to find it

MHCP, MensLine, Mindspot, This Way Up, Lysn. The Australian map of what works, what costs what, and what to call tonight.

26 Apr 2026 · 8 min

No XLIV · MENTAL HEALTH

Online therapy options, compared

Lysn, BetterHelp, Mindspot, This Way Up, MensLine. What each one costs, who it suits, and which to start with this week.

26 Apr 2026 · 8 min

No XLIII · MENTAL HEALTH

Building a support network when you don't have one

Wednesday night, no one to call. The honest map for rebuilding adult male friendship from a low base, without pretending to be someone else.

26 Apr 2026 · 9 min

No XLII · MENTAL HEALTH

The first time you cry as an adult man

For many men in their forties and fifties, the first real cry of adult life arrives without warning. Here is what it actually feels like, why your body did the thing, and why the next time will be easier.

28 Apr 2026 · 6 min

No XLI · MENTAL HEALTH

The anger after it all

After the sadness comes the anger, and it usually arrives months later, often pointed at the wrong people. Here is what the anger is doing for you, and how to feel it without letting it run the house.

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min

No XL · MENTAL HEALTH

Depression vs burnout, knowing the difference

Most Australian men present to their GP with burnout language and walk out diagnosed as fine, when the underlying picture is depression. The two overlap heavily. The treatment is different. Here is how to tell.

28 Apr 2026 · 8 min

No XXXIX · MENTAL HEALTH

The suicidal thought that drops in

Many Australian men have a single suicidal thought during a hard period and never tell anyone. Here is what those thoughts usually are, when they pass on their own, when they signal something more, and exactly what to do.

28 Apr 2026 · 8 min

No XXXVIII · MENTAL HEALTH

SSRIs, the conversation no one has

Australian men resist antidepressants more than almost any group in the developed world. Here is what they actually do, what they actually cost, what the trial-and-error looks like, and the question of whether you need them forever.

28 Apr 2026 · 8 min

No XXXVII · MENTAL HEALTH

The morning after the bad night

I woke up at 6:14am and the first thing my body did was check whether last night had been real. The dread sat behind my sternum like a small wet stone. My jaw was sore from clenching.

28 Apr 2026 · 6 min

No XXXVI · MENTAL HEALTH

When the rumination won't stop

The 3am loop is not problem-solving. It feels like work, but it produces nothing except more of itself.

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min

No XXXV · MENTAL HEALTH

The fear of not being useful

The first morning after I lost a job, I woke at 5:30am as usual, made coffee as usual, and then sat at the kitchen bench staring at the wall because there was nowhere I had to be.

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min

No XXXIV · MENTAL HEALTH

The dad shame spiral

My eight-year-old left a note on my pillow last Tuesday. It said, in pencil, "Dad I love you even when your sad".

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min

No XXXIII · MENTAL HEALTH

Men's Shed and other grounded options

Non-clinical regular contact is a load-bearing wall in any decent mental health stack. The shed is one option. There are others.

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min

No XXXII · MENTAL HEALTH

The 12-month mental health check-in

It was a Sunday in late April, the kettle was on, and I had a notebook open on the kitchen table. The page was blank except for a date and the words "annual check". The dog was asleep against my foot.

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min

No XXXI · MENTAL HEALTH

When you realise it isn't just stress

Stress lifts on the weekend. This thing did not. The moment you stop calling it stress is the moment something starts to change.

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min

No XXX · MENTAL HEALTH

The friend who can hold the bad stuff

It was a Wednesday night and I was sitting on the back step of a friend's house in Glenbrook, telling him the worst thing I had been carrying for six months. The dog was somewhere in the yard.

28 Apr 2026 · 6 min

No XXIX · MENTAL HEALTH

Breath and cold water, the overrated and underrated

It was a winter morning at North Bondi and there were eleven blokes shuffling around in board shorts in the half dark, all of us pretending the wind was not the issue. The water was thirteen degrees.

28 Apr 2026 · 7 min